10 million miles

I’m totally in pre-baby mode: rummaging through all of our 0-3 month clothes, cleaning out the baby tub, organizing the linen closet, getting rid of all kinds of stuff… It’s that motherly instinct thing that says, “ANOTHER PERSON IS COMING! Make room! Get ready!” My God-given hormone-driven preparation couldn’t come at a more symbolic time: the very time when we intentionally prepare our hearts and homes for Jesus’ coming, Advent.

I learned from Kerry at A Ten O’Clock Scholar that “spring” cleaning our homes before Christmas is actually a Scandinavian Advent tradition; one that may effectively work its way through our muscles and into our hearts as we prepare the way for Jesus Christ by also repenting of our sin and returning to Him.

Besides “spring” cleaning our home and our hearts, I’ve come up with a few Advent traditions that I’d like to try in our family… (I read many beautiful ideas from Jeanne’s Advent carnival. Various readings helped me to understand the tradition of doing most of the Christmas decorating on Christmas Eve. In recent years, I was proudly wrapping and piling all of the presents under the tree waaaaay ahead of time, but now I think we’ll wait until Christmas Eve to deck the halls with ornaments and gifts!)

* continue our lighting tradition every Sunday night

* sing “O Come, O Come Emmanuel” as our family song for December

* use two or three of the Daily Scripture Readings from The Book of Common Prayer in my morning Scripture reading with Vivienne

* focus on serving others in Christ’s name by placing a manger in the living room (perhaps under the Christmas tree) with a bag of hay next to it. As each of us intentionally serves someone in Christ’s name and for the purpose of preparing His Way, we will place some hay in the manger.

I’m hoping that these four traditions keep us focused on Christ and provide some beautiful teaching moments… along with memorable family lovin’.

Are you planning on celebrating the Advent season in any specific way? If so, please tell!

What happens when a Christian who struggles with same-sex attraction desires freedom, accountability, and godliness? This person doesn’t know who to turn to in the Church: it’s such a sensitive subject and most people are deathly afraid of it. Along with abuse, it’s one of the most secretive heart issues walking around in the Church. Yet, it is an ancient temptation over which the Holy Spirit most assuredly offers freedom.

But to whom can a person turn? This particular temptation is tricky because a man or a woman who is intentionally turning away from homosexuality and pursuing integrity must choose someone of the same sex to confide in and walk with. Yet, they probably won’t choose someone who seems confident in their gender-role/heterosexuality for fear that they might not understand the struggle or know how to offer direction. Nor will they choose someone who seems as if he has struggled with the same thing for fear that he might be tempted if approached for accountability purposes. Furthermore, the last thing this person would want is for the other person to listen to the confession and the desire for help while wondering, “So, is he attracted to me?!” This is probably why so many Christians who face this particular temptation stay silent until the world and their flesh offer deathly comfort and companionship. It seems as if the devil has this person’s hands tied when it comes to walking in freedom.

But he doesn’t. Scripture teaches us that “God is faithful, who will not suffer [us] to be tempted above that [we] are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that [we] may be able to bear it.” (1 Cor. 10:13).

This way to escape is through our Savior Jesus - our Wonderful Counselor - and through the Holy Spirit - who is an amazing accountability partner when we listen to His promptings, warnings, and encouragements.

The way of escape is also provided through people in the Church, who simply must enter each other’s lives to encourage, bolster, redirect, and reconcile each other.

Perhaps problematic temptations like same-sex attraction inspired Paul to teach in his letter to the the Galations, “Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such a one in the spirit of meekenss; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted. Bear ye one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ… as we have therefore opportunity, let us do good unto all men, especially unto them who are of the household of faith.”

Perhaps temptations like this inspired James to write, “Brethren, if any of you do err from the truth, and one convert him; let him know, that he which converteth the sinner from the error of his way shall save a soul from death, and shall hide a multitude of sins.”

There is an appropriate time when we must go after each other; we need not always require others to figure out who would be a safe, strong, humble, restorative friend.

I used to think that Paul’s and James’ instructions about restoring each other lent themselves to witch-hunting and misjudgment. But after today’s reflection, I can see that when led by the Holy Spirit, these teachings lend themselves to graciousness and rescue.

I just love those moments when Viv and I cuddle up in bed and talk about the day.  She’s always winding out the one million things on her mind while straightening the ornaments on her mini nightstand Christmas tree, drinking milk, and chewing her blanket’s silky border.  Well, last night, we lay side by side, talking about this and that.  Suddenly, a smile crossed her face as she reached her finger up to poke my eyebrow and exclaim, “YOU LOOK JUST LIKE A HAMBURGER!”

In comparison to what others endure day to day, my suffering is quite minimal: a toddler’s accident here or there, a very close relative kicking against my ribs and sitting on my bladder, the reoccurring tasks that face many-a homemaker (shopping, vacuuming, sorting through Christmas and fall decorations, baby clothes, etc.). Nonetheless, on days like yesterday when everything seems dismally exhausting, the “suffering” part of my life seems quite overwhelming. (A good friend once said that she never compares each other’s “suffering” because each of us has a cross to bear that legitimately feels like a cross to us and requires us to lean on Christ… even if someone else views it as a cake-walk.)

Yesterday, I let my falling-down maternity pants and my to-do list itch their annoying little ways into my bones and set me on edge all day. It took me most of the morning to figure out that the reason V was whiny was because I was whiny; I hadn’t looked her in the eye, laughed with her, or played with her for a couple of hours while I stressed about all of the “stuff” I had to do. It’s days like that when I have to slow down and ask “why am I doing all of this again?” and remind myself why I work to build our home, raise our child(ren), and bless my husband.

Needless to say, the article that my sister, Erin, sent a week ago was the perfect devotional for my whiny and distracted heart. Despite the specific title, John Piper’s “Counseling with Suffering People” provided just the right correction and encouragement for me in relation to my God-given ministry right here where the toilets need to be cleaned, the hardwood floors showcase every piece of dust, and where a little girl is longing to be taught how to delight herself in God. ‘Thought you might enjoy the article, too.

article-counseling-with-suffering-people-john-piper.pdf

“The aim of all ministry is the glory of God through Jesus Christ. God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him. But suffering is a great threat to our satisfaction in God. We are tempted to murmur, complain, blame, and even to curse and quit the ministry. Therefore, joy in God in the midst of suffering makes the worth of God - the all-satisfying glory of God - shine more brightly than it would through our joy at any other time. Sunshine happiness signals the value of sunshine. But happiness in suffering signals the value of God. Suffering and hardship joyfully accepted in the path of obedience to Christ show the supremacy of Christ more than all our faithfulness in fair days.” - John Piper

“Do all things without murmurings and disputings: That ye may be blameless and harmless, the sons of God, without rebuke, in the midst of a crooked and perverse nation, among whom ye shine as lights in the world; holding forth the word of life; that I may rejoice in the day of Christ, that I have not run in vain, neither laboured in vain.” - Philipians 2

Jesus… “…and His name shall be called Wonderful Counselor…”

As I’ve been in our Counselor’s intensive “marriage counseling” program for 5 and 1/2 years now, I have learned a great deal about how to love one man well, how to be thrilled with submission, and how to live in peace with another human (I’m not saying that I do all of this yet; I’ve just learned a lot about it. That’s why I signed up for the course that lasts as long as we both shall live…)

One of the most valuable things I’ve learned is that marriage is all about making peace: dying to myself, loving and honoring another human. Contrary to popular belief, marriage is not about making war. Sadly, most of us enter marriage better equipped for a raging war than for a peaceful union. We come with our defense mechanisms firmly in place, poised for the first face-off. Before we know it, we’ve either slain our spouse or run off to a shelter in sheer terror. Thankfully, Jesus intentionally dismantles our defenses as we allow Him to restore our marriages. Consider Psalm 46: 9…

He maketh wars to cease unto the end of the earth; he breaketh the bow, and cutteth the spear in sunder; he burneth the chariot in the fire.

In this verse, I see our two most common defense mechanisms: the sword (always offensive, even when used in defense; sharp, aggressive, wounding) and the chariot (run away! run away! run away, fast!). Interestingly, in most marriages, one spouse is skilled with the sword; the other is ready to zoom away in that chariot if things get too tough (chariot, here). Working together, these defense mechanisms can distance two people so quickly and efficiently that divorce terminates the union before it has had a chance to begin.

In order to preserve our marriages and make peace in our homes, we must allow Jesus to transform our previously-constructed defense mechanisms: we must obey when He says, “put away your sword, trust me to defend you” and “return home, little chariot. Be patient and long-suffering”.

Of course, this can only be done when we spend time with Jesus and obey His word, for it is He who will “judge among the nations, and shall rebuke many people: and they shall beat their swords into plowshares, and their spears into pruninghooks: nation shall not lift up sword against nation, neither shall they learn war any more.” Isaiah 2: 4

As we all long for global wars to cease, I hope we also consider how we may follow Jesus out of the wars within our own homes and into peaceful families.

O house of Jacob, come ye, and let us walk in the light of the Lord. Isaiah 2: 5

There is so much pressure in blog-world to do something significant for one’s 100th post: throw a party, give gifts, pop a cork… I’m not sure what to do for mine. Maybe I’ll just jot down a list of 100 simple sweet things that I love, hoping that you’ll find something on the list to love, too. On second thought, maybe not; because all I want to do today is just post these pictures from Tuesday’s play day at a local church and then take the rest of V’s nap time to catch up on some reading.  Yep, that sounds like a fine way to celebrate my 100th post. :)  Anyway, the church that hosts this weekly play day fills its auditorium with climbing gyms, little houses, tricycles, and see-saws.   I have never been so convinced in the presence of guardian angels as I am when I watch the miraculous interceptions of dozens of potential collisions.

“Tut, tut…it looks like rain!”   (And it did.  ALL day long.)

This Sunday, Dr. Putnam used Psalm 98 (we sing much of this psalm in “Joy to the World”) to explain that Advent is a time of remembering what God has done throughout all of time and what He will do… it is a time to encourage each other to look for his perfect Salvation and relieving Judgment. All of creation will sing, shout, clap, and bow when Jesus returns… including you and me.

I think it’s important then, that we prepare for this glorious time! I’m just beginning to learn how the Advent season can be a wonderful intentional time of expectation. Needless to say, our little family is just beginning to develop some Advent traditions.

* So far, we have decided to “light the Advent candles” each Sunday by lighting something that will provide for an evening event. We began this tradition last year and look forward to continuing it throughout the years…

The first Sunday of Advent, we light the Christmas tree and house. The second Sunday, we light the chiminea outside, look up at the stars, and enjoy cups of hot cocoa. On the third Sunday, we light a fire in the fireplace and wrap presents or sing Christmas carols. On the fourth Sunday, we light candles at the dinner table and enjoy a special meal together.

* We also will teach our children to anticipate Jesus’ return by describing what Jesus looks like according to John’s Revelation: white hair, fire in his eyes, gold feet. Vivienne and I sing these verses to a simple tune that I concocted: “Jesus is riding a white horse! Jesus is riding a white horse! Jesus is riding a white horse; a white, white horse!” (The other verses: “Jesus’ hair is white… white like wool”, “Jesus’ eyes are like fire… like refining fire.” “Jesus’ feet are gold… pure, pure gold.” etc.) We’ve also taught Vivienne that Jesus will appear in the sky and that we are to look actively for him. I distinctly remember one afternoon when V could barely speak, she toddled by the front window, pointing to the sky, and said, “Jesus is coming! Very soon!”(Maybe you, too, know how a moment like that - when a child seems to know a secret larger than the universe can hold - sticks with a mother forever.)

* Finally, for those of you who love Scripture, ancient Christian writers, and liturgy, the wonderful Ancient Christian Devotional edited by Oden and Crosby begins with Advent and continues through the year; I highly suggest beginning this book at this time and living a year enriched by Scripture and the thoughts of ancient Christian writers who are encouraging us to run towards Christ…

“I was in the Spirit on the Lord’s day, and heard behind me a great voice, as of a trumpet, saying, I am Alpha and Omega, the first and the last: and, What thou seest, write in a book, and send it unto the seven churches which are in Asia; unto Ephesus, and unto Smyrna, and unto Pergamos, and unto Thyatira, and unto Sardis, and unto Philadelphia, and unto Laodicea.
And I turned to see the voice that spake with me. And being turned, I saw seven golden candlesticks; And in the midst of the seven candlesticks one like unto the Son of man, clothed with a garment down to the foot, and girt about the paps with a golden girdle. His head and his hairs were white like wool, as white as snow; and his eyes were as a flame of fire; And his feet like unto fine brass, as if they burned in a furnace; and his voice as the sound of many waters. And he had in his right hand seven stars: and out of his mouth went a sharp twoedged sword: and his countenance was as the sun shineth in his strength. And when I saw him, I fell at his feet as dead. And he laid his right hand upon me, saying unto me, Fear not; I am the first and the last: I am he that liveth, and was dead; and, behold, I am alive for evermore, Amen; and have the keys of hell and of death.” Revelation 1: 10 - 18

At a Hen’s Pace is hosting a carnival of Advent ideas and thoughts on November 28th. I’ll be there, looking for more valuable insights and traditions to enrich our family’s experience of looking for Him in the sky… hope to see you there! And THERE!

AND Two Square Meals is giving away an Advent book, if you’re interested! (The deadline is soon, so visit now!)

We’re back from a week of Thanksgiving celebrations, totaling 3 official Thanksgiving meals. ‘Turns out that we’re more historically accurate than we mean to be: the pilgrims celebrated their first harvest festival for three days, too!  Of course, the meals were OUTSTANDING, but the best parts were the simple moments tucked in between…

“As the years pass, I am coming more and more to understand that it is the common, everyday blessings of our common, everyday lives for which we should be particularly grateful. They are the things that fill our lives with comfort and our hearts with gladness — just the pure air to breathe and the strength to breathe it; just warmth and shelter and home folks; just plain food that gives us strength; the bright sunshine on a cold day; and a cool breeze when the day is warm.” - Laura Ingalls Wilder

Here are some memorable moments…

Our first celebration with Ryan’s side of the family…

A sour pickle! (Just like Laura Ingles Wilder in Party at Grandpa’s)

We captured a sweet moment in the toy room…

While celebrating with my side of the family, we spied V trying out her new binoculars while listening to “Three Little Kittens”and had to stap a photo.

These are three of Vivienne’s best friends: “the boys” and Grandpop.

Playing with Cousin A and Aunt Erin at our second celebration: my sister’s husband’s family’s…

My family’s traditional post-Thanksgiving tree-finding outing. Except this year, we toted our Douglas Fir home before our third Thanksgiving celebration on Saturday night.

So, we’re back and unpacked and grateful for the time we could spend with all the people who we love so so so much.

“In everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.” 1Thessalonians 5:18