The Big Family Book Party: March 2017

LauraAll Posts, Books

Our whole family got together and decided to share what we have been reading this month. From the youngest to the oldest, we’ve each chosen one book that we think you – or someone you know – would love. Even Ryan gets in on the fun. (He’s a good sport.)

We hope that you enjoy our suggestions. What have you been reading lately? Let us know in the comments!

For the babies…

Get your pointer finger ready for DK’s My First Words. We love having a small “first words” board book on hand to point out the bright, well-defined pictures of common items from grapes to telephones. You add the sound effects, questions, and counting. The possibilities are endless.

For the sweet toddlers…

Audrey recommends Brinton Turkle’s Rachel and ObediahShe especially loves acting this story out, running around the house as fast as she can and being rewarded two silver coins, one of which she gives to her good-sport-of-a-brother.

I love this story because it highlights a little girl who speaks up for herself, works hard, excels, and is gracious in her victory. What a wonderful example for my little girl. (It’s a sailor-be-warned story for big brothers, though!)

For the bird-lovers…

This five-year-old boy can do an incredible Mourning Dove call. He opens his window in the morning and literally has an exchange with a Mourning Dove that sits on the Catalpa Tree in the front yard. And he learned it all from The Little Book of Backyard Bird Songs book.

I am so glad that I purchased this a few months ago. I wanted our children to have a resource of reliable bird songs without splurging for those major multi-card systems (they are intense). This is just right for us with its realistic bird songs and beautiful illustrations and descriptions of each bird. We prop it on the window ledge for quick access when we spot a feathered friend.

For absolutely anyone…

Our voracious reader recommends Five Little Peppers and How They Grew. My mother read this delightful book to me when I was girl. It is one of my fondest childhood memories. I read it aloud to my children last year and we absolutely loved it together. Lia read it again this year and snatched it right off the shelf when I asked her for a recommendation. This one comes to you with a big smile.

For the tweens…

The Penderwicks is our 11-year-olds top recommendation when she’s talking “books” with someone. She just loves those make-you-laugh-aloud kids. The personalities, the mishaps, and the friendships are so much fun.  Jeanne Birdsall has written a series following this family through time. We all think that it’s this century’s Little Women. You’ll have to tell us if you agree.

For wives…

My friend, Mary, and I just finished working our way through Barbara Rainey’s “Letters to My Daughters: The Art of Being a Wife” together. We both agreed that Rainey’s words of wisdom helped us think more realistically and more biblically about marriage. It spurred many wonderful conversations – not just about marriage – but also about our security in Christ and our growth as His redeemed daughters.

Here’s an idea: give this book (it’s a gorgeous hardcover work of art) to a newly wed and offer to read it together. Schedule 4 or 5 get-togethers in which you’ll talk about it along the way. The book itself is helpful, but with your added thoughts and friendship, nothing could be better!

For the history buff…

Ryan recently discovered the joy of audio books. This month, he recommends Bill O’Reilly’s Killing Lincoln. It reads like a thriller, but it’s jam-packed with historical answers to all of your “What happened to Abraham Lincoln?” questions. Every once in a while, I’d listen in and was fascinated by all of the interesting details that the textbooks forget. (And I must say, it caused me to ask myself, “Why do I expect everyone to like me if everyone didn’t even like Abe?” Big life lessons.)

Now, it’s your turn: This month, I recommend reading _________. Let us know in the comments! 🙂

The Reluctant Meal-Planner’s Meal Plan: My Gift to You

LauraAll Posts, Food, Healthy Living, Motherhood

(mmm… delicious gluten-free granola bars that we bake every week)

You need to know that food is not my forte.

For years, it has been an up-hill battle…on a mountain of Jello.

In our family of 7, it works logistically for me to take responsibility for menu planning, grocery shopping, and food preparation, but it isn’t my strength or my interest.

Everything about it – the budgeting, the coupons, the food allergies, the health ideals, the elusive photographed recipes in magazines, the time it takes… it all just exhausts me.

For years, week after week, I’d sit with a pile of recipe books and a few grocery store fliers and take 2 stressful hours to figure out what we were going to eat for the next few days. It was the worst part of my work at home. And I knew it needed to change.

So I looked for help and gradually, things improved. Now, many years later, I’m contentedly and consistently working with a peaceful meal plan and grocery list that has improved my attitude about food tremendously.

Do you struggle with budgeting, menu planning, grocery shopping, and food prep, too?

I have good news for you: there’s hope! You can improve. And you can find joy in food.

Here’s how to begin finding joy in food:

Ask God for it!

I had complained about food one too many times when my friend Steph generously asked, “Have you ever asked God to give you joy in food?”

No, of course I hadn’t. (Why do we so often overlook our most obvious needs in prayer?)

So I began to ask.

Every time I had to make lunch for our hungry kiddos, I’d take a deep breath and ask God, “please give me joy in food.” Every time I sat down to plan my grocery list, I’d gasp, “Please give me joy in food!”

Over time, God did grant my request. As I learned more about food, implemented realistic solutions, and made deliberate decisions to move forward, I gained increasingly more joy in food. In fact, I’m writing this post because I do have joy in food and I’m delighted to share what I’ve learned.

Read foodie books.

Did you know that this is a genre on the shelves at your local library? People who love food actually write entire books about how food intersects with their lives, how they’ve been formed by food. These books are much more than a compilation of recipes. They are stories like, “When my dad was in the hospital, I couldn’t sleep. So I stewed some left-over dates in a little pot. I drizzled some honey on top and sat in the dark kitchen eating them, one by one.”

Now that I can get into. A beautiful, memorable moment with just “dates and honey” on the grocery list? Yes, please. Spontaneous, rule-breaking, emotion-driven creativity in the kitchen? Yes, please.

A few years ago, I read Bread & Wine. This was my first foodie book. Shauna Niequist tricked me into reading a book about food by making me think it was about God. (That’s my genre.) But she wrote about God AND food and helped me see the connection.

After that, I cranked out 5 foodie books in a row. I just kept checking out the next book on the library shelf. What’s great about foodie books – and different from Food network – is that you see a person relating with food in real life. I remembering snuggling up with Molly Wizenburg’s Homemade Life, and Ruth Reichl’s Tender at the Bone.

Each author helped to change my mind about the value of food.

I began to see food’s noble place in the home and community. This was good for me: I discovered that I could gladly invest my time and energy into food because it built people, homes, and communities.

Now, I have a vision – a why – in order to love it and work hard at it.

Listen to the meal-planning experts.

Because I asked God to help me in food, I pursued understanding through research and trusted Him to help me find useful resources. In my journey, I learned a great deal from resources like Cut Your Grocery Bill in Half with America’s Cheapest Family.

The few things that I implemented from this and other helpful resources were:

    • Plan a biweekly menu: Do a big grocery order every 2 weeks.
    • Forget coupons for now. I just can’t juggle this ball.
    • Plan a seasonal menu plan, including snacks, breakfast, lunch, and dinner with simple meals that everyone likes. Type it out on one page, attach it to the fridge, and stick to the list.
    • Print a 1-page list of the ingredients and groceries we buy regularly. Also, attach to the fridge. Highlight or circle the items you need from week to week.

Now, when I sit down to plan our menu and write my shopping grocery list, I know what I’m making, I circle the groceries we need, and write a few extras in the margin. I’m finished in 15 minutes.

We’re enjoying nourishing food that is easy to prepare. I see my grateful family around the dinner table, and they see one happy momma.

If that’s not one big slice of “joy in food,” I don’t know what is.

And now, a gift for you and your kitchen…

You’ll love this 15-page printable with the best meal-planning tips that I learned along the way, a copy of my own meal plans, a copy of my weekly grocery list, and 5 of our family’s favorite recipes (including those scrumptious gluten-free granola bars!).

This plan is simple, do-able, and all for you.

Submit your name and email below to receive this gift!

 

The Reluctant Meal-Planner’s Meal Plan will begin your own journey to find “joy in food”.

Share this with a friend who needs a little joy in food!

Remember the Dream, Momma: A Whisper of Encouragement For When the Days Drag On

LauraAll Posts, Marriage, Motherhood

‘Remember when you were a little girl and daydreamed about holding your own little baby? With your dolly, you practiced washing her, dressing her, putting her in that little high chair, and feeding her? You didn’t realize it then, but you were dreaming of laying your life down for a child.

And now, you are living the dream.

‘Remember when you were a teenager and you daydreamed about marrying that handsome, strong guy? In your journal, you’d write out everything you liked about him, agonizing over his every move, and longing for him to be by your side. You didn’t realize it then, but you were dreaming of giving your whole self to a man.

And now, you are living the dream.

Maybe, probably, (definitely), the dream was dreamier back then. But now, it’s real.

Real has a beauty, complexity, and dignity all its own.

Never doubt the goodness of your God-given dreams now that you’re walking around in them, all grown up.

Never doubt it, even if they are more difficult than you imagined.

You were right to dream them, and you didn’t dream them alone.

Your Creator wove those compex desires in your heart to guide you and tether you to the home you are building today.

Remember that He has never left you alone in those dreams, but is right by your side, working with you to live out those dreams.

All those years ago, when you hugged your dolly tight, you may not have known to glance slightly around and see God Himself by your side.

But now you do.

 

{My prayer for you today is something like this… “I thank my God in all my remembrance of you, always in every prayer of mine for you all making my prayer with joy, because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now. And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ. It is right for me to feel this way about you all, because I hold you in my heart, for you are all partakers with me of grace…” Philippians 1: 3 -7}

Would you savor this in your heart and then share it with another mother or wife who needs some encouragement today?

Got a whiney child? Here are 2 things that helped us.

LauraAll Posts, Character Training, Motherhood

Lia and I recorded this video SEVEN years ago when she was just two years old. (Isn’t she the cutest thing?)

We were working hard on that whining thing because she whined through most of her waking hours. It didn’t help that she was super-small and had no pain tolerance – even the wind hurt her and we heard about it.

We were exhausted. Because whining is exhausting.

Today, that brown-eyed baby is a lovely 9-year old who – anyone will tell you – is one of the most contented people you could know. She is pleasant, thoughtful, and friendly… not to mention, kinda rugged. She loves to play outside and can work hard in a garden. If you met her you’d say, “Wow, she rarely has a negative thing to say!”

How’d she grow from “whiney” to “content”?

Lia gave me permission to tell you about the big changes that occurred in her life, so I’m happy to share what helped us.

Intentional character development…

We both agree that consistent and happy training like the example in the YouTube clip was very helpful. I’m so glad that she was home with me during those years so I could gently guide her out of her slumps over and over again. Sure, it took patience and endurance (on both our parts), but I think that by working on this day in and day out, we were able to get to the heart of the issue.

I’d pray for her consistently, and I know that God was at work in many ways to continue creating His masterpiece in Lia.

Because she had the preK-version mindset that “The Cup is Half-Empty”, when I’d tuck her in bed at night, I’d remind her of the beloved verse from Psalm 23, “He anoints my head with oil, my cup overflows!” (In fact, we still say that this is her “life verse”.) Remembering this truth and reviewing the ways God had blessed her that day helped to transform her mind (and mine) about life.

And a big, diet change…

But for Lia, it wasn’t only character development that helped her stop whining.

When she was three or four, we noticed that she was miserable every morning at breakfast, hunched over, moaning about a stomach ache. We tried all kinds of possible solutions, but couldn’t seem to help her. Was this just part of her whininess? Or was it something more? 

Then, my husband proposed that we try taking Lia off of gluten. He has a clinically-confirmed gluten sensitivity and thought perhaps she was “a chip off the old block”.

So, we helped her to avoid gluten for a week. Within 24 hours, we saw a change in her.

After three days, the stomach aches were completely gone.

So was the incessant whining.

All of a sudden, she was a regular whiney kid at worst. (Sure, she’d whine every once in a while if her socks were wet or something, but not all of the time like she did in the past.)

She grew taller.

Her already-fine vocabulary even increased.

We noticed. Other people noticed.

Lia noticed. And she loved the change…

Because she felt so much better, inside and out, Lia has taken full-responsibility for avoiding gluten. I’ve never had to look over her shoulder because she is more intentional about it than I am. I deeply appreciate this about her.

I’m so thankful that God led us to helpful choices – some for the heart, some for the tummy – that were perfectly suited to our little girl.

Consider these two approaches to helping your whiney kiddo enjoy life:

1.Character Training

We discovered helpful ideas in Turansky and Miller’s Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes in You and Your Kids. They gave me specific approaches to daily challenges.. even the words to say. I’ll also be grateful for their insights! (Also, check out their National Center for Biblical Parenting for more helpful resources.)

2. Think outside the box. Is it possible that something else is going on? Could gluten be weakening your kiddo? Or maybe it’s food coloring? It’s worth trying some big changes in order to nurture your child toward health and happiness!

I’d love to know your tips and tricks for whiney children. Would you share them in the comments? (After all, I do have a 2 year old, which *could be why* we pulled up these old YouTube clips…)

P.S. Share this with a friend who needs to know she’s not alone. 🙂 

Build a Path for the Soul: 12 Poems, 12 Hymns, 12 Scripture Passages

LauraAll Posts, Homeschooling, Morning Time, Motherhood

The goodness of a well-loved walking path…

When I attended the University of Richmond, I walked around the beautiful Westhampton Lake almost every day. Sometimes, I’d walk by myself listening to music or sermons. Sometimes I’d run, while thinking or praying. Sometimes I’d walk with friends, talking, laughing, or crying together, sometimes singing.

I thought we had traced that path so many times that the earth would wear thin and the lake would suddenly fall through. But, it never did. Instead, it strengthened me each time I made my rounds. That walking path – the loveliness of the water, the trees, the sky – became a part of me… and the round and round about-ness did me good.

We all need a well-loved soul path, too…

I’ve decided to create an internal “walking path” for our children: a path of poems, hymns, and scripture that we can store in our hearts and minds, repeating them round and round again. This path will mark the terrain of what we speak, sing, and think about together over the years. I’m hoping that as we repeat these words around the table, in the car, upon our pillows, they will never wear thin, but rather deepen our affection for beauty and truth.

The plan to build a path for the soul…

The path is 12 poems, hymns, and Scripture passages that I want our children to have well-established in their heart-of-hearts by the time they graduate from our homeschool.  Every month, we’ll review one of each during our Morning Time.

In a year’s time, we’ll cycle through all 12 poems, hymns, and Scriptures. My dream is that the following year, we’ll walk about the same path again. And the year after that, and the year after that… etching, savoring, and treasuring this goodness in our minds.

For now, I’m simply printing each one out as we need it, slipping it into a plastic sleeve, and filing it in our morning binders. I’m daydreaming about having them printed in a hardback book for each graduating child.

It will be something to to take down and slowly read and dream over the years.

Here are the links to each poem, hymns, and scripture. Click here to download 3 beautiful printables for your annual binder or refrigerator.

12 Poems:                 

  1. Jabberwocky – Carroll (To imagine! To triumph!)
  2. Custard the Dragon – Nash (To have a story on hand to tell a child.)
  3. If – Kipling (To persevere through labor and every difficult task.)
  4. The Gettysburg Address (To honor the people who sacrifice on our behalf.)
  5. Shakespeare Sonnet 116 (To better understand love.)
  6. The Apostles Creed (To join our voices with the saints of old.)
  7. Shakespeare Sonnet 29 (To wrestle down the jealous, discontent soul.)
  8. On His Blindness – Milton (To rest in God’s grace.)
  9. Sonnet 43 (“How Do I Love Thee?”) – Browning (To better understand love, that baffling mystery.)
  10. The Charge of the Light Brigade – Tennyson (To charge into literature and charge home with valor in our hearts!)
  11. God’s Grandeur – Hopkins (To murmur words when the beauty of the earth would otherwise render us speechless.)
  12. In Memoriam (Ring Out, Wild Bells) – Tennyson (To say with hutzpah when the year is ending and a new one is around the bend.)

12 Hymns:

  1. In Christ Alone
  2. He Will Hold Me Fast
  3. Holy Spirit, Living Breath of God
  4. Be Thou My Vision
  5. Before the Throne of God Above
  6. Be Still My Soul
  7. Joyful, Joyful We Adore Thee
  8. This is My Father’s World
  9. My Heart is Filled With Thankfulness
  10. Compassion Hymn
  11. My Worth is Not in What I Own
  12. Fairest Lord Jesus

12 Passages of Scripture

  1. Psalm 23, The Lord’s Prayer  (for prayer…)
  2. Romans Road/ John 3:16 (for salvation…)
  3. Proverbs 31, 1 Timothy 3: 1-13 (for womanliness and manliness…)
  4. Hebrews 11 (for heroes and friends…)
  5. Matthew 5 (for a glimpse of the Kingdom of Heaven…)
  6. 1 Corinthians 13 (for love…)
  7. Psalm 91 (for peace…)
  8. Psalm 51 (for repentance…)
  9. Romans 8 (for security…)
  10. Romans 12 (for relationships…)
  11. Deuteronomy 5:6-21, 6: 4-9 (for holiness and gratitude…)
  12. Psalm 139 (for faith-as-a-child…)

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What would you include in your internal “walking” path?

Reading with my 2-Year-Old (featuring 4 lesser-known bunny books that we love)

LauraAll Posts, Early Elementary Education, Homeschooling, Preschool


‘Tis the season for bunnies!

They’re everywhere, aren’t they?

(In fact, just the other night I had a dream that Winston Churchill was a giant bunny doing a puppet show for some children. He couldn’t remember the character’s names or the plot, so Sarah Mackenzie from Read Aloud Revival appeared as the Voice in the Sky to coach him along. That’s what happens when you watch The Crown and listen to the RAR podcast in the spring.)

At any rate, I want to jump right in and share the titles of 4 bunny books we have read over and over again through the years.  I’m always surprised that they’re not on the “Favorite Books for Toddlers” lists because they’re super-duper cute.

They’d be perfect to tuck in an Easter basket come April. In fact, I’ll give you some hands-on gift-ideas in just a minute…

Introducing Alan Baker’s Little Rabbit series!  There’s… Gray Rabbit’s 1,2,3; Gray Rabbit’s Odd One Out; Black and White Rabbit’s ABC; Brown Rabbit’s Shape Book; White Rabbit’s Colors; Little Rabbit’s Snacktime; Brown Rabbit’s Day… and several more.

(SO MANY BUNNIES!)

Preschool at our house…

Every school day, after I work one-on-one with our Kindergartner, the 2-year-old joins us for a snack, reading a picture book, and doing a simple activity associated with the book. She isn’t quite ready for Five In A Row, so I pull a picture book off the shelf and we either act it out or do a something simple to experience the story.

I’ve recently pulled 4 of them off the shelf for our Pre-K/ Kindergarten time and we’ve been loving them all over again. This past week, we read one of the Rabbit books each day and enjoyed a short-and-sweet activity afterward.

Here are the activities we did with each book:

(Each activity took 5 minutes to prep and about 15 minutes to enjoy.)

Brown Rabbit’s Shape Book: To imitate Brown Rabbit’s experience (spoiler alert!), I tucked a handful of balloons inside a clean yogurt container. Then, I placed the container in a cardboard box with a rectangular notecard labeled “To the KIDS!” and delivered the box.

Of course the kids loved opening it up and dumping the balloons out. We blew up the balloons and let them whooosh around the room. (Note: you may want a handy balloon pump so you don’t faint. I had to dig ours out…)

Black and White Rabbit’s ABC: As you can see above, the kids got out their green paint and paint brushes and made big, green apples just like Rabbit. We experimented with making the drips switch direction on the paper, just like Rabbit did. And then, we added some nice, big “kisses”.

Gray Rabbit’s 1,2,3: After reading this one, we opened some tubes of play-doh and tried to make some of the animals in the book. (I wish I would’ve taken a picture of this because you would’ve been proud of my rumpeting, trumpeting elephant.

Gray Rabbit’s Odd One Out: Each of our kiddos has a personalized little toy bin in the school room where we toss their miscellaneous toys for a quick clean-up. We emptied the bins and sorted the toys together – dolls with dolls, balls with balls, superheroes with superheroes, looking for the special toy that would be the “odd one out”. It was the duct-tape hockey puck. (Isn’t it always?)

A few gift-ideas…

I think that each of these books lends itself to a meaningful hands-on gift. In fact, we sent “Brown Rabbit’s Shapes” to our nephew with a pack of multi-shaped balloons. You could tuck a pack of paintbrushes and a box of watercolors in with “Black and White Rabbit’s ABC” or a few tubes of fresh Playdoh with “Gray Rabbit’s 1,2,3.”

Why “play” books?

I get a kick out of reading a book with children and having a little experience afterward because it’s fun for all of us. Secondly, it builds the child’s connection with the book, improves his or her comprehension of the plot, characters, and vocabulary. Not to mention, it starts them off on a wonderful lifestyle of responding personally and creatively to the books that they read – this is a treasure for today and for the future.

Maybe a child in your life would enjoy this, too?

Happy Spring!

 

Why We May Serve Other Women Gladly When We are Able

LauraMinistry, Motherhood

(a friend, holding my baby when my arms were weary…)

When women are in high school and college, it takes every they’ve got to adjust to adulthood, focusing on academics and relationships. We say they need older women to call, text, and befriend them. Take them out for ice cream, invite them into their homes.

But the women in their twenty-somethings need to give everything they’ve got to adjust to careers and marriage, focusing on building homes and managing complex responsibilities. We say they need older women to disciple them in Scripture, to meet weekly to study Scripture and pray together, to have them over for dinner and game nights.

But when women become mothers, it takes everything they’ve got to adjust to sleepless nights, self-sacrifice, and the daunting responsibilities of parenting. We say they need older women to lend a helping hand with the children, share an understanding smile and practical wisdom. Offer to babysit, serve in the nursery, teach Sunday School, and tell her it’s okay to cry.

But when women are mid-life, it takes everything they’ve got to adjust to teenagers, increasing self-sacrifice, career intensity, and aging parents. We say they need older women to befriend them and show the ropes of caring for young adults. Host the kids for a weekend so the parents can get away, teach the teenage girls how to sew, and nudge the hubbies to teach the young men how to work with wood.

But when women are in their 60’s and 70’s, it takes everything they’ve got to stay in touch with their adult children, welcome grandchildren into the world, and say “good bye” to their parents, if they haven’t already done so. Sometimes health concerns creep up, or they discover that their wrists hurt after holding babies, or poor eyesight keeps them from driving at night. Their hearts and calendars are full as they care for their husbands, and their grandchildren…We say they need older women to wrap their arms around them during life’s joys and sorrows, to give them a vision for the next few decades.

But when women are in their 80’s, and 90’s, it takes everything they’ve got to stay on top of their health, let alone lovingly coordinate their calendars with the many family and friends that they’ve gathered around them over the years. We say that they need older women to befriend and mentor them.

Not one single woman – from the youngster to the granny – is ever totally available, totally free from complications and trials, totally strong to lean upon. Nonetheless, we are designed and called to lean upon one another.

Each generation of women leans heavily on the one before it, on the very women with hearts and arms already full, on the very women adjusting constantly to aging, hormones, relationships, and countless external demands.

How could this be? Why don’t we fall apart, crushing one another with our demands?

Miraculously, as each woman quickly reaches her own capacity and feels her own fragile breaking point, she leans back on Jesus, who holds and supports the whole Sisterhood with great strength, giving us everything He’s got.

He is the Rock of Ages, the Alpha and the Omega, going before the grannies and following the youngsters.

Upon this Strong Foundation, each woman helps another.

There, upon Christ, it’s a luxury to be the one serving.

And it’s a gift to be the one who is served.

May we be gentle with one another.

May we gladly do what we are able to do, when we are able to do it.

And may we seek to understand…

as we lean.

 

Does Bible Study overwhelm and intimidate you? Me, too.

LauraAll Posts, Bible Study

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I used to study the Bible with fervor…

Just one year ago I was joyfully teaching two women’s Bible studies – one in the morning, one in the evening. I was daily studying Scripture, loving every word. The Holy Spirit carried me from precept to precept, and I loved sharing what I was learning: the connections between the Old Testament and the New, the meanings of complicated words, the excellencies of theological truths, and the hopeful application to everyday life.

Until now.

Now, Bible Study feels impossible…

Eight months ago, we welcomed our fifth child. Now, caring for a newborn and homeschooling our other children takes everything I have to give.

It’s odd to write this post – just a year later – as a woman who feels like Bible Study is a foreign language, a foreign skill, even a foreign interest. Instead of Bible Study feeling as natural as my own heartbeat (as it used to feel), it now feels more like wrestling a lion.

Although I read a few verses while I’m nursing the baby, if you were to sign me up for a weekly Bible Study with a workbook and a pile of multi-colored highlighters, I’d cry because I’m sure I can’t do it.

I’m learning that when a woman is not studying Scripture it may be due to reasons far more complicated than “will-power”, “priorities”, or “scheduling”.

Bible Study gives me flashbacks about being on a boat…

I can best describe this struggle by taking you back in time to my childhood visit to an amusement park. I asked to go out in one of the bumper boats in a little manmade pond.

I realized pretty quickly that I had no idea what I was doing. Everyone else zipped around, making waves, maneuvering surprising bumps into other boats, and throwing their heads back in triumph. They were having so much fun.

But there I was, a little girl, stuck in a boat I couldn’t drive, being splashed about by happy, happy strangers.

My boat bobbed over to the opposite side of the pond, nudged up against the guardrail, and sat there.

Three minutes later, the attendant blew his whistle and beckoned all of the boats back to the dock. The other boaters collectively sighed that the fun was over. They easily turned their boats in the direction of the dock and zipped back obediently.

But I was still sitting on the opposite side of the pond, trying to figure out how to run the engine, not to mention the lofty task of steering the boat back to shore.

It was abundantly clear: I was stuck fast.

With wild desperation in my eyes, I looked up at the attendant.

“You’re supposed to bring your boat in!” someone yelled from shore.

That unleashed an explosion of instructions from the eager boaters waiting in line. “Put your foot on the right pedal!” “Turn the wheel to the left!” “Now turn it to the right!”

The pedals, buttons, and steering mechanism were puzzles I couldn’t solve.

I tried to steer left, but the boat moved right. I tried to reverse, but the boat lunged forward.

I tried to listen to the instructions hurtling over the water, but to no avail. It didn’t matter how well the people on shore yelled, I was completely unable to operate that boat and drive it to the dock.

I remember giving up, raising my hands in helpless surrender.

That’s when the attendant effortlessly jumped into a docked boat, zipped across the pond, and towed me to shore.

I was so embarrassed as I got out of the boat and wondered, why couldn’t I do that? What’s wrong with me?

Needless to say, I lost all of my interest in boats that day.

What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I do Bible Study?

Lately, I feel like the girl in the boat when it comes to Bible Study.

I feel confused, overwhelmed, and incompetent. Meanwhile, women everywhere are studying the Bible and loving it. They’re doing their homework, learning, discussing, and thriving while I’m sitting on the sidelines, stalled out.

I don’t want to sit here anymore.

If you happen to feel overwhelmed by Bible Study, but want to move, I have a plan to get us unstuck.

How to get unstuck…

My former enthusiasm for Bible Study is in my memory instructing me that it is possible to love and engage in Bible Study. I offer this to you: it really is possible to learn how to study the Bible even when it feels impossible.

If you’ve never tried to study the Bible, you may not grasp how much it will benefit your life. You may not know how the Holy Spirit will use it to heal, encourage, equip, and correct you in ways you never dreamed possible, or how you will become acquainted with Jesus more intimately than ever before. But I can remember that all these things are true: when I diligently studied the Bible, I reaped blessing upon blessing.

I am asking God to restore my ability, confidence, and joy in Bible Study. Would you like to join me?

We’ll need to do 3 things:

  1. Adjust our mindset.

Bible Study is not an optional recreation or a lark for bookish people. You and I must study the Bible, even if it’s difficult. God’s Word is our nourishment and fortress. It’s how we know Jesus. That means we need to adjust our mindset to believe Bible Study is a necessary thing for us to do, though it may require significant sacrifice and investment.

  1. Ask someone to help.

Do you know someone who is enjoying Bible Study lately? Ask her to sit by your side while you read a few verses together. Listen to her wonder, watch her highlight and take notes, repeat the words she looks up in her Concordance, and look over her shoulder when she prayerfully applies the verses to her own life.  

If you make a weekly date of this apprenticeship, you’ll start to acquire some skills and will grow in understanding and interest.

More importantly, ask God Himself to spark your interest, to increase your ability, to instruct you, and to help you. He will.

  1. Apply ourselves to consistent, high-quality practice.

The “younger me” could have learned how to drive boats if my life depended upon it. Of course, I would’ve needed hours of instruction and practice in order to forge pathways in my brain that were not there before, but I could have mastered it eventually. (Who knows? With enough exposure, instruction, and practice, my impossibility might have turned into a life-long passion.)

The experts say that anyone can learn anything if she practices consistently with high-quality instruction. In fact, 99.9% of people who perform with excellence, do so because they received high-quality instruction and practiced well, consistently.

In our culture, we typically practice the things we’re naturally able to do, but in this case, you and I must practice the thing we’re naturally unable to do.

If we practice Bible Study –  say, for 10 high-quality minutes a day – we will rattle the walls of impossibility and… improve. We’ll get our bearings within that big book, we’ll learn the vocabulary, and we’ll gradually discover the everlasting pleasures tucked within those pages.

God graciously invites each one of us – especially those of us who feel like Bible Study is impossible – to begin.

After all, He knows best that “with God, nothing is impossible”.

Here we sit, confounded in our impossibility.

We want to study the Bible, but it seems so difficult.

What’ll we do?

Let’s lift our hands in helpless surrender.

Our Attendant – God Himself – will come to our aid.

As we apply our hearts and minds to the hard work of learning how to study the Bible,  we will soon join the Psalmist in saying, “I will lift up my hands toward your commandments, which I love, and I will meditate on your statutes.” Psalm 119: 48

I’m sure of it.

The Cord of Three Strands: What God Does in Marriage

LauraAll Posts, Marriage

DSC_0733

At weddings we hear these words from Scripture, “a threefold cord is not quickly broken.”  We remind one another that a husband and a wife must partner with God and all three of them must work together as the threefold cord.

Intertwined together in marriage, these three beings will create a strong bond that can endure life’s ups and downs.

Well now, I’ve been wrapped up in that holy cord for almost-fifteen years.

I’ve pulled away from it in selfish seasons, fraying, untangling, tugging away.

I’ve clung dearly to it in blessed seasons, intertwining, connecting, and burrowing in.

I’ve discovered that, in all seasons, I’m happiest when I assent to it in the light of Scripture.

I’ve come to rely on this Love that will not let me go, as desperately as I rely on oxygen.

After these fifteen years of marriage, I’m sharing something quite dear about this threefold cord… something so true and constant, so humbling and so good.

This truth comes to mind in the quiet of daily life, while I’m brushing my teeth or switching the laundry or driving into town.  It comes to mind when the man sleeping next to me is warm and breathing and strong.  It comes to mind when, day after day, we somehow work side-by-side to keep five children fed and clothed.

It comes to mind whenever I wonder (and I often wonder), How in the world have we stayed together all this time?

How in the world have we endured through these hardships, differences, stresses, flaws, and unimpressive humanity? 

How in the world are we waking up and living each day, then falling asleep again side by side? 

How in the world are we still intertwined? 

This truth comes to mind and quietly grounds me.

It’s this: that the Third Strand has done – and is doing – all of the work.

The Third Strand is God Himself and He has been wrapping us up, for fifteen years.

He Himself has moved in and around, before and behind, holding two frail, inconstant, and deeply grateful humans together.

That glorious, constant Third Strand.

That Source of all strength and endurance, wrapping around and around and around us, gathering us, tucking us, hiding us, and treasuring us inside of Himself.

Maybe someday, as the Third Strand keeps wrapping Himself around, Jesus will be all you see of us two.

Maybe someday.

 

“For by him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—all things were created through him and for him.  And he is before all things, and in him all things hold together.” – Colossians 1:17 

2 “Secrets to Scholastic Success” for High School and College Students (Pass it on!)

LauraAll Posts, College, English Literature, High School, Homeschooling

Stacks of books

While high school and college students are on my mind, I thought I’d share these two secrets that, I believe, are secrets to scholastic success.

Pass them along to the student you love. 🙂

1. Go to office hours.

Going to your teacher’s or professor’s office hours can change your life.

At the very least, you’ll improve your grade. At the most, you’ll learn something that will enlarge and encourage you. That’s a pretty good range of possible results.  The chance that your professor will share personalized insight and instruction is like gold offered every week during office hours. Take the gold! It will be more valuable to you than your diploma.

I did not know how amazingly powerful this one little habit could be until I was teaching at Penn State University and saw for myself that students who attended office hours got better grades than they would have otherwise.

It’s a simple formula, and I saw it work in real time.

Besides, I discovered that I liked the office-hour students the best. I found myself rooting for them. I was happy when their papers improved and when they “got” a concept that we discussed during office hours.  To make up for my shortcomings as a biased teacher, I’ve been passionately disclosing the secret to becoming one of the favorites ever since.

Here are a few helpful Office Hours Rules and Regulations:

  1. Do not go to office hours to ask for a higher grade or to whine about anything. That’s not what office hours are for. Besides, there are so many articles going around about “whiney, incompetent students  who can’t handle a B-” and every teacher/ professor is prepared to resent the whiner. You are forewarned.
  2. Do go to office hours with a genuine question about the content of the course. If you don’t have a genuine question, you haven’t engaged in the content enough. Open your text book, take some notes in class, and you’ll discover a question or two.
  3. Do go to office hours in search of specific feedback on your work. Bring along the working outline for the paper that is due next week. Bring along a paragraph that you don’t quite love yet. Bring two math problems and extra scrap paper, prepared to work them out with your professor, side-by-side.

Whatever you do, just go. Stop in and say, “Hi! Thank you for the lecture today!” Then take it from there.

2. Read Picture Books.

If you’re not in the homeschool world and/ or if you do not work at the local library, you might not know that your library is stacked with accurate, well-researched, and memorable picture books (and chapter books, for that matter) about every topic under the sun.

Homeschoolers call them “living books” because they take incorporate facts into stories, into real life. Many of us opt for living books over textbooks 90% of the time.  Not only are living books far more accessible than your textbooks, but they’ll also help your textbooks make sense.

For example, if you are an English major and you are about to embark on a new Shakespeare play, first read a good quality picture book rendition. This will get you acquainted with the characters, setting, and plot.  It will take you 2 minutes to reserve the book through your libary’s online service, 5 minutes to pick it up from the library, and 10 minutes to read the book. That 17 minutes will spare you from being confused and overwhelmed when you begin reading the play the day before your 5-page response is due. That’s 17 minutes well-spent.

Or, if you are a geology major, camp out for 45 minutes in the “Rocks and Minerals” section of the children’s library and gain some of the scope, terminology, and ideas that you’ll need to thrive in your 101 class.

‘Same’s true for history, anatomy, poetry, chemistry, foreign studies, business, animal sciences, agriculture, math, philosophy, and every other subject you may pursue.

Picture books will prepare the soil of your mind so that more complex ideas and details have somewhere to land, go deep, and thrive.

I’ve spent countless hours hunched over textbooks, highlighting and index-carding my way to a B.S. in Biology, a B.A. in English and a M.A. in English Literature.  And yet I feel as if I’ve gained a more enduring and fruitful education from reading beautiful picture books to my children.

Don’t miss out on enriching your education with personalized insights from your professors and your picture books.

(photo credit: http://lithub.com/in-praise-of-the-book-tower/)