5 Proofs that I’m Growin’ Up:

* Our off-white furniture moved to another idealistic couple’s home; we opted for a dark leather set and decided that this time, the couch would not double as a “swimming pool,” tent, hide-out, gym mat, etc.

Good-bye, Impracticality! (sniff)

* Curtains now privatize our after-dark Benny Goodman showdowns (After all my years of passionate “I hate curtains” tirades, I realize now that “hate” is a strong word.)
* Our children wear undershirts (A custom in which we did not participate when Vivienne was a baby. Poor girl; she may have had plenty of attention and way-too-many baby pictures taken, but she certainly missed out on some of the tried-and-true parenting trends that I’m just now getting the hang of. Like, for instance, cutting grapes. Even though V’s been eating whole grapes since she was, oh, six months old or so, I am now beginning to cut her grapes. She’s almost three. I must say, though, that she likes cut-grapes better. Her hands get stickier, I can never decide how small is “small enough”, and I almost slice my own fingers, but I have a lot more peace this way. *Apparently, the best way to cut them is length-wise in quarters.)

* I am suddenly committed to soy and/or beeswax candles and don’t even clip the coupons for Glade-anythings (it’s all poison, I tell ya!).

* I carry a diaper bag (Another custom in which we did not participate when Vivienne was a baby: the stockable pockets, matching changing pad, and plastic lining finally got me. And wonders of wonders: I usually have an extra burp-cloth, snack, and lip balm stashed in there somewhere. Who knew these things could be so handy!)