My Stillbirth Story (Podcast Episode)

LauraStillbirth1 Comment

When we’re gathering around the dinner table or piling into the van, I naturally count the kids. “One, two, three, four, five, six.” Despite all of the energy and noise, I often get the sensation that someone is missing. Call me crazy, but it’s not quite loud enough. And there’s just a little too much elbow room. I find myself carefully numbering each of their precious heads and wondering, Is this everybody?

I’m not the only one to feel this way. The kids say it, too, from time to time. “Is this all of us? Huh. It feels like we’re missing someone.

What’s happening in those off-kilter moments?

I wonder if we’re simply missing Juliette.

Juliette, whose beautiful name I chose from the start – long before I knew she was a girl – and long before I knew my pregnancy would end in stillbirth.

One day, during the heart-wrenching aftermath of saying good-bye to Juliette, my sister sent me this poignant quotation from Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet:

“Good night, good night! Parting is such sweet sorrow,

That I shall say good night till it be morrow.”

Juliet, Romeo and Juliet, Act II, Scene II

I couldn’t have anticipated the connection of their names and their all-too-soon partings. You probably know the story of Shakespeare’s Juliet. This is the story of mine.

Click here to listen to “Finding Hope at the Grave of Juliette”

One Comment on “My Stillbirth Story (Podcast Episode)”

  1. Dear Laura. A friend had a link to your still birth story on FB. And I had to share. Like you I had a still birth daughter at 20 weeks, and like you the loss is still a constant thought most days. The difference is that the world of medical mental health has come a long way. You see my precious daughter was born almost 41 years ago. Doctors ignored my doubts of something wrong, no routine ultra sounds back then. When I did have one I was in active labor and my little girl was rushed away at delivery. We never saw her. It was just not the way it was done. Do I resent this? For a while I did, especially when things changed in the later 80’s and friends and family were allowed this bonding time. I of course have gotten past it and understand it was just done that way. I just wanted you to know I treasured your story, and like you went on to add two more children to our family. And I now have 5 amazing grand children. Thank you for sharing. It truly touched this grandmas heart.

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