Wednesday Weenies

I do plan on blogging all kinds of blogs about the things that I am deeply thankful for this month, but I thought I’d start the season off with a couple of things that drive me nuts.

1. CoolSavings.com

Interestingly, this service is not cool as all it has done for my pursuits to be more frugal is crowded my inbox with emails from “Secret Crushes”, offers for credit cards, and coupons for $2 off of $579 purchases at stores I never patronize. They also signed us up for a $15 monthly phone charge that we immediately noticed on our regular phone bill and canceled. Furthermore, withdrawing an account is extremely tricky and maybe not even possible. That’s why I’m considering proposing to the company that they change their name to “UNCoolSavings.com.”

2. Bob’s Red Mill Gluten Free Baking Mix

I’ve been going crazy trying to figure out which ingredient is sour, spoiled, moldy, or rotten in every baked good that I’ve made for the past two months. I’ve thrown away a container of xanthan gum, passed over eggs, and eyed my honey suspiciously. You might know how frustrating it can be when the time, energy, money, and pregnancy-inspired expectation that go into batches of cookies, pumpkin spice bread, and blueberry muffins tastes like rotten mittens… time after time. Turns out, the culprit is the freshest form Bob’s Red Mill… What a sneaky little bugger. None of us prefer the taste of this flour, so I’ll be parting ways with Bob and returning to my search for the perfect GF flour mix. I’m just glad I figured it out before diving into the baking season with perpetually disappointed fervor.

3. Politicians at the door at 11 o’clock in the morning:

Could I start a campaign that educates all male campaigners (and door-to-door evangelists and fraternity boys who are raising money for some cause by rolling kegs for 10 kilometers, etc.) that it is thoughtless and rude to show up uninvited at a stranger’s home in the middle of a week day. In fact, in my humble opinion, it is ruder than arriving smack in the middle of supper time or even on the weekend.

Here’s why:

Q: Who is likely to be home (if anyone) at this time?

A: mothers, children, and elderly people.

If a thinking person watches the news for any amount of time, would he conclude that anyone in that category (mothers, children, elderly people) should feel particularly comfortable with strange men showing up at their door unannounced?

This summer, when I kept the front door open to let the breeze through the screen door, strange men showed up with clipboards and business cards in hand, smiling broadly about some cause.It was down-right creepy when I’d be playing with Vivienne in the living room only to turn around and see someone at the door who wanted my vote, money, or spiritual commitment. If these men were surprised when I immediately locked the door and kindly but firmly ended the conversation before it began, they didn’t realize that even if they were genuinely wonderful men, they were posing as threats.

I’ve since developed a brief statement encouraging them either to send an “I’ll be visiting your neighborhood on such and such a date” cards, or to come around in the early evening when there is a greater chance of the man of the house being home… if they must come around at all.The way I figure it, if they believe that their cause is so worthwhile, they’ll be willing to muster up a little integrity and face the wrath of a family about to sit down to dinner. Besides, if they play their cards right, they might show up just in time to sample some Gluten Free rotten mitten spice bread.

4. While I’m on a roll:

Doorbell-ringing politicians (speaking of…), garbage trucks, construction vehicles, screaming children, a neighborhood full of lawn mowers, chain saws, and jackhammers that begin ringing, screeching, and banging precisely 10 minutes after a toddler and her pregnant mother have fallen asleep for their afternoon naps.